Recently, I’ve been involved with several conversations with couples who are working on their guest list. It’s amazing how much stress rises when working on this part of the planning aspect of the wedding. Sometimes you just have to start with the end in mind. It’s important to realize that your guest count will have a major impact on the bottom line cost. Also, on your wedding day you want to look around the room and know that each person in attendance are the closest and most important people in your life.
With that said, here are some Guest List Insights I have gathered over the years of planning weddings. These are discussions and strategies from real weddings.
Guest List Insights:
- Close Family and Friends: This is your “A” List that includes your immediate family (Parents and Siblings), Grand Parents, Aunts, Uncles, God Parents, close First Cousins, and your Best and Most Dearest Friends in your life. Some of those close friends most likely will be in your wedding party and/or ushers and hostess.
- Officiant/Pastors and his Wife: It’s pretty customary to invite the person officiating the wedding and his wife. Make sure they are on the list.
- Single Friends: Two thoughts on this one. First, if you have built a relationship with your single friends significant other, then yes consider inviting them too. Secondly, if you have not built a relationship with the significant other, then that spot should be available for another important relationship. Side note: It’s nothing wrong with having 2 different rsvp cards. One for the guest that are a plus one and the other for guest that are the only one! One of my prior weddings last year, the couple assigned their single friends to a table together and they had a blast.
- Children: One of the current trends is opting to have childcare for those guest with children or a common approach of having an adult only wedding and reception, which appears on the wedding invitation. It’s up to you to decide the atmosphere you would like to have and if your budget can accommodate children in the number.
- Co-Workers and your Boss: Again, it’s all about the relationships that you have developed in the work-place. Here is an interesting concept to consider. Typically, your table will have 8 people or even 10 people per table. This is a good number to limit your co-worker guest count too. Again, if your budget is driving guest count decisions, then use the table count as your rule of thumb as an idea. They most likely all know each other, therefore a plus one is not needed. Of course, assign them to the same table at the reception.
- Neighbors: I have seen couples invite the neighbors that they actually have a real relationship with. The extent of their relationship goes beyond the “Hi” and “Bye” while heading to work and back home. They have actually been in each others homes and have spent some quality time with each other. Basically, if it’s only a “wave” type of relationship, I’m sure it’s a good idea to not include them on the list.
- The Alternative Guest List or the “B” List: It is a good idea to create a “B” List if your “A” List rsvp’s come back less than expected. The key is sending your invitations out early enough with a specific deadline to assess when you can send a few more invitations out. Prioritize that “B” List just in case!
I hope this was helpful in your guest planning process for your wedding.
Have Fun Planning!
Nishaka
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